I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
