What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
