making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
