C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
