so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
