it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
