you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
