So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
