Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Dick very happy bro
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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