My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
