hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
