i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
