i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Alive.
So much puke
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
