Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
