It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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