Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize