so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
