The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
