he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
