Buhtt sex?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
