She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
