she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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