Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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