We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
