so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
