Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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