What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
