I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
