using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
