She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Vodka?
Forever.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
