i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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