playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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