his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
my liver is dry heaving
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
