chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize