I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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