I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
