It's Friday. Sex?
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
This baby is an asshole
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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