I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize