so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
