Just fell off a train. Bad.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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