Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
