BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize