I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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