I don't usually arrange sex via text message
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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