Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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