I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
