no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
ttyl tear gas
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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