oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
