Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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