I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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